Can I be a bold advocate?

Today I am stepping into a roll ive been avoiding, advocate. It sounds so official, as if you have to have a PHD. I am no expert, not in anything except my own life.

I am not one of those super moms who goes to school, volunteers, works, protests, makes changes, has a career… . Wait. That is so weird bc as I was writing that I realized I do those things. Ha! Well ok, let me rethink why I don’t feel worthy to be called a birth, VBAC, homebirth, AP whatever advocate. I guess the moms I know who are making huge changes in the world, like changing policy, writing grants, running businesses successfully all seem to do it right, have a perfect mission, & have balance. I do not. Keyword: successful.

I’m unpredictable still. I haven’t really fully stepped into a professional roll since having kids. So any “advocating” I was doing was very personal. I’d talk with senators and professionals but it was always as a consumer. It was from my very own point of view and for the benefit of my community (tho I am someone who believes the whole friggin universe is my community) and for the safety of my family.

Then there is the liability issues. Like, if I start having to talk on behalf of more than my very own self then that sounds like a LOT of responsibility. For instance, I wish I could be “called” to be a midwife but woah that sounds like a big responsibility! My initial response to the idea of being part of a mother’s birth and the baby’s very first and ONLY entrance into the world makes is “birth needs to be honored , it is so important, i cant possibly do it justice”. You know what, I said that 7 years ago about motherhood.

Life cannot be run by wise old women who have magically come across the secrets of life. At 27, im just now realizing that my excuse- OMG I’m too flaky to do that!- cannot hold up. I MUST step into life. I am who Is in my life.

I’ll never turn into those wise women I admire unless I start living, BOLD.

What types of people do you hold on an untouchable pedestal? What does advocacy mean to you?


About anderzoid

Life is Bittersweet. God is love, the rest is minor. Ever evolving. Incorporating the ancient & alien into the home environment.
This entry was posted in birth, cesarean, reproductive rights, vbac, women. Bookmark the permalink.

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